Crossing the Finish Line: 110 Days With No Porn
Big kudos to Justin for sharing his sexual integrity journey with us. Justin wrote this for our blog in 2017.
"Given that it’s been 110 days now that I haven’t watched pornography, I would say that being open about my struggle has really worked. There were moments during this time that I can’t say I was fully virtuous in my sexuality, and even more moments where I was seriously tempted. However, for the first time in a long time, I felt like I had a real choice in the matter of my behavior. When the weights are balanced it becomes a lot easier to tip the balance in our favor.
We can help each other overcome porn
The second reason I wanted to write this blog is that I believe the High Noon lifestyle is infectious. There have been so many who have come to me and stepped up, to be honest about their struggle about pornography, and through those people sharing it allowed the space for me to be honest. I want to give that same gift to the people in this movement and beyond.
Yesterday a young boy from Korea came up to me after hearing me share honestly about my past. He immediately started to cry. He said to me “I watch porn, I’m disgracing my parents and I’m a Blessed Child, and I’m disgracing True Parents.” He said, “I was floating on the water one day thinking about just letting myself drift away. But couldn’t because of how hurt my parents would be.” When he shared this with me I started to tear up as well, because I knew that feeling of shame. However, me and Sammy, who was translating for us, just wanted to embrace him. We told him “we also have struggled and you don’t have to go through it alone.” He just cried and we hugged. It was such a beautiful, sad, and hopeful moment.
Reaching for the next goal
My next goal is to get to the point of sobriety where I can become a sexual integrity mentor myself. I know there is always the possibility of a relapse, but I’ve got to take what I learned and give it my all. I’ll still be checking in with this blog every once in a while. Until then God bless and thank you!"